And I feel bad that it's taken me this long to finally realize it. Random texts when we need reassurance just isn't enough.
The other day for some reason I remembered the last time we saw each other. I can't help but smile when I remember your minute long I don't want you to leave hug.
I feel that the entire world, at least the mass majority of it, have a peaceful, happy mindset. We all strive for serenity in a Locke type of fashion. The stresses life puts upon us might hide this urge, in some very deep, but if you try hard enough you can find this in just about everyone. In my endless random searches through the internet I came across this tidbit which I couldn't help but share. A video which asked one question. Very simple, very easy, but in this world with all of its closing doors it gave way to enormous possibility.
The question, which was asked of 50 random people on the streets of Brooklyn, New York was one which I had to think long and hard about myself.
"Where would you wish to wake up tomorrow?"
This simple question brought smiles and fantasies in these strangers and truly showed the yearning for peace and tranquility in all of them. Watching bits like this really ensnare a sense of pathos and brighten my day entirely.
Another video done in London can also be accessed at the website --> http://fiftypeopleonequestion.com/films/4-london-uk
William Wordsworth wrote that the memory of a field of daffodils raised him from depression when thing got rough or as he put it:
"For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,"
For me it is things like this. The human element in us all coming out in small pieces, making us smile, making us happy.
I ain't got no time to grow old. I ain't got no time to take it slow. We'll be burnin soon and they'll say it was our fault. But I don't care what they say. Just go with my instincts and live life that way. They're pressuring us to live, to make the most of it. I look at them in their rocking chairs and infinite wisdom and I am appalled.
My life is here and now. I am living it. I have no choice. It's not about these rules and these social norms. It's simply about coming on up and staying on top. My top is different than yours. So what's wrong with a little destruction? How can we enjoy the mountain air with oxygen tanks strapped to our legs? I choose a different path.
We'll be burnin soon and I'll love every second of it. Let me take your hand. Turn your back to the voices, to the lights, to the world. Let me take your hand and lead you into the riot. When all the world is burning and anarchy is abound, we'll smile. We alone will be happy.
We took a shortcut. We know a secret. We can dance in the flames.
When you come for me, run. Come quickly, like never before. Come raging and violent, like shouting in the stairwell. Come with purpose, like banging on my door. Come angry and upset, like the worlds been lost. Come passionate and emotional, like nothing is left. Come desperate and helpless, like it's all over. Come needy and seeking, like I'm your last chance.
I'll hear your running feet. I'll hear your shouts. I'll hear the bangs of your fists. I'll know the worlds been lost. I'll know nothing is left. I'll know it's all over. I'll know I'm your last chance.
When you come for me, run. Come quickly, I'll be waiting. Come raging and violent, I'll calm you down. Come with purpose, I'll answer in kind. Come angry and upset, I'll bring peace. Come passionate and emotional, I'll hold you tight. Come desperate and helpless, I'll keep you safe. Come needy and seeking, I'll protect you. I promise.
I'll do all of this and more. Much more. On one hand I'm scared to show you what I'm capable of. On the other I'm scared you won't come to me at all.
It's all so very simple. Living life as we know it. We spend our lives in sweet monotony. It's all pretty plain. But that's ok. We're happy with that. Let's watch the snow fall inch by inch. Let water dance with sand. See the wind race through trees. In our minds life will be grand. We're not insane. Watching each little thing. Carelessly growing up in circles of serenity. Spending each second in innocence. So let's go somewhere only we know. Somewhere we can be alone.
Deviation from this life is hopeless. We just fall asleep again, to avoid it all. Or maybe I was just asleep. I knew it was a dream to good to be true. Don't tell me I was just asleep. Let this fantasy be mine to keep. But if it's true, I'll be there when you awake. How else are cheeks kept dry today? But that's just the tip of the iceberg. I'll do whatever it takes. Given the chance.
So when nightmares come alive and I'm struggling to survive. Don't wake me up. I'm sleeping in. Searching for a world in which dreams come true and the earth slows down for two.
Points North is a collection of random thoughts and ideas that have accumulated in my head throughout the day. There is no goal. Just a collection. Though I hope it inspires you to think.
And it is also for you. For all the things that I can't bring myself to tell you in person. It is much easier to convey emotion through text because we do not see the reaction, do not witness the immediate criticism. This way I can tell you everything, without getting the negativity in return, if it happens at all. I hope you can read this now and then. So then you will know how I really feel. It's my only way of telling you.
My head is everywhere, and nowhere. I don't understand what goes on in it and I try to make sense out of it all. This is just a tool for organization, for a step toward simplicity. Take it as you will.
